Business Items :: Caffeine Makes Me ADHD

{ 2008 06 21 }

Caffeine Makes Me ADHD

I’m an Obamaniac, but the moment Michelle Obama exchanged fist bumps (or “pounds,” if you prefer the Any Given Sunday nomenclature) with the cast of The View marked the demise of that casual greeting. It’s only a matter of time before Ellen DeGeneres is doing the macarena on the fist bump’s metaphorical tombstone.
What now? I think I’ll try knocking forearms, but let’s keep that to ourselves.

This site would already have a swanky new animated welcome page, but I made the fool mistake of treating ActionScript 3.0 like ActionScript 2.0. Apparently when Steve Jobs’ minions were developing Adobe CS3, they decided it would be a really good idea to make their proprietary language function exactly like Java. Sure, it’s more powerful than Flash 8, but it’s only slightly more user-friendly than trying to do the same things with XHTML and JavaScript, which cost about $1300 less than CS3. Great idea, guys.

I have a confession to make. Every once in a while, when I’m in an unfriendly mood at work, I think “Heroes” and smile. Hopefully, that will be the corniest thing I write for a long, long time.

Worn down on Friday morning, I hit some of the more poignant tracks on my iPod: Pink Floyd, “When the Tigers Broke Free”; Outkast, “True Dat”; and Arlo Guthrie, “Alice’s Restaurant: The Massacree Revisited.” When Arlo intimated that “if you want to stop wars and stuff, you gotta learn to sing loud all the time,” I found myself ambivalent. Is that sage advice or merely the residual activism of an unrepentant hippy stoner?
Relatedly, I recently had occasion to encounter a few young women whose opinions I respect, and they openly stated that they’d voted for Hillary. In fact, when I showed my Obamaniac colors, the universal and unprompted response was “You fell for that!?” Uhh, yeah, I guess I did, but I didn’t think I’d been bamboozled so much as I’d chosen leadership over administrative efficacy. Then again, I suppose I must be some kind of sap, if I’m still listening to “Alice’s Restaurant” in 2008.

The dictionary entry for expletive includes as an example “the word ‘it’ in the sentence It’s raining.” That got me thinking…what is the implicit object of the pronoun “it” in that sentence? Seeing as rain is both a noun and a verb, one could argue that the entire sentence should be one word, right? (Hint: Were something else, such as leopard-print men’s thongs, falling from the sky, you’d probably say, “Banana hammocks are raining upon us!” in either terror or delight.)